I can hear the birds singing to me outside. The opening of a dewy flower. I wish I could sing like that instead of the annoying crow. You may say that’s crazy…you don’t sound anything like a crow. Oh, but sometimes I do. When I complain about the mess left in the kitchen or about having to go to the grocery store….again…. or about not ever having enough money. Sometimes I squawk…and then I regret it.
A crow is more like the dandelion weeds trying to overtake our serene back yard. No one loves to see them sprout up, and yet I water them everyday…allowing them to grow strong roots and choke the pretty green grass. Crap…
I want to sing like those happy birds out the back door. Reagan’s little ears perk up when he hears them – “birt!” he says – Yes, “BIRD” I say. “BIRT!” And I smile at him. What pleasure he has at the sound of a wild melody – his face crinkles up when I raise my voice.
Sometimes I’m afraid of sounding so pretty – it’s not what people usually expect from me and I don’t want to dissapoint them…no…I wouldn’t want that. <sigh>
Abs of Steel 
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