Evolving Still

So, I feel like I asked more questions than I answered with my post last night. But, that’s the process, isn’t it? Asking….the questions are more important than the answers sometimes. The truth is, we may never know the full story of original intent. I don’t know if I believe in ultimate purpose in the sense of “one thing” you must do with your life or you’ve missed the mark. That’s a lot of pressure on flawed humanity, don’t you think? God made us this way…children who make mistakes – a lot of mistakes – along the way. It’s how we learn and thus I come to this unpopular conclusion. People want to know that they are doing the right thing with their lives – that one thing they were created to do and anything else only leads to unhappiness and defeat. I think that’s bull.

If we pay attention then we’ll get close – but I think we have to pay attention to the right things. It difficult to filter out the opinions of man. People have strong opinions and love to share them, don’t they? Sometimes their motives are purely selfish, though and we must be careful. Being honest about the true desires of our hearts is sooooo difficult to do. This is where the secret things are kept hidden behind years of fear and rejection because if we were truly honest and open about what we really wanted it could be more difficult than we are willing to endure.

I watched a program yesterday with two people dying of cancer and they were discussing how their lives were so much better now that they had this to deal with. It forced them to really live. We never get some magical permission from somewhere to start living and if we wait for it then life passes us by. So, if I knew that I only had a short time left on this earth to live – to make a mark – to be successful – what would I be doing right now?  Would I be struggling with not wanting to dissappoint people? Would I be so worried about what other people might think of me if I became the person I know I could be?

None of us are who we could be – let’s be honest here. There is always room to grow and learn and evolve – if we aren’t then we are giving in to death.  The question is – are we willing to do the work to become who we want to be?

That’s a good question…


10 Responses to “Evolving Still”

  1. 1 christophercaleb
    October 23, 2007 at 8:02 pm

    I think Hope and I are treading the same ground. Maybe we’ll run into ya’ll on the way!

    And yes, I think Bryan is suffering from dorkness.

  2. 2 Steph
    October 23, 2007 at 8:25 pm

    I don’t believe everyone has ONE purpose- it’s a long walk we are on, and there all sorts of turns along the way. Who knows what lies ahead- your steps are ordered, and they may take you down a path you never expected. I am looking forward to seeing what’s next! I love you!!

  3. 3 candress
    October 23, 2007 at 9:16 pm

    I agree with you that it is crazy to think that if you are not accomplishing that ONE THING, you will never be fulfilled. A whole life should be about one thing??? Most of the people I know have more than one outstanding gift or talent and seem to touch the lives of many people when they use ALL the things they got to work with. That’s how ya change the world. I have learned some of the coolest things through my mistakes. Just my thoughts. Love ya

  4. October 24, 2007 at 12:21 am

    I don’t know- I think we are created to do ONE THING. To find God. Everything else is optional.

    I get the feeling that you’re hungry to do something you’re afraid to let yourself do. What could happen? You could fail. You know, a long time ago, I used to rock climb. I was pretty good at it (as opposed to now, when I couldn’t chin myself with help!). But I kept succeeding and succeeding- I kept making it to the top without slipping. And over time, my fear of falling got stronger and stronger. Until finally I was so afraid of falling (of failing) that I wouldn’t climb anymore.

    Go ahead and fail and get it over with! Try it! Risk it! Expect to fall on your face! Because then you won’t be so afraid, and then the next time failing won’t hurt so bad. And then maybe the next time you might succeed….

    Incidentally, when are you going to play one of your own songs in service? You can do it! The fear is always worse than what actually happens, you know. I will pray for you and cheer for you when I see your name go up on that big scary screen! Haven’t seen it up there since the “rain” song you played at King’s Memorial.

  5. October 24, 2007 at 1:59 pm

    this is soooo much easier reading on your blog than it is writing on my blog. and yet i’m still crying. ouch. this artsy fartsy side of my personality is so annoying sometimes.

  6. October 24, 2007 at 2:10 pm

    I agree. How can we be made for just ONE thing? I look at the life of David if he was just made for one thing he could have stopped when he was a teenager. I feel like I am always evolving. Who would have thought I would be doing what I am today?

  7. 7 Nathan
    October 24, 2007 at 4:23 pm

    I think we do have ONE ULTIMATE purpose, but that it is fulfilled by every step. We choose to step closer or farther away. What makes the journey interesting is that our starting points are different, our detours are different, and our way of processing the journey is different. We know the goal is Jesus and loving him, but we find out who He is and what He’s like all along the journey, through every mistake and wrong turn. And when we are really fortunate we make a few right choices! You’ve made a lot of right choices. The proof is the people around you and ministry opportunity that you’ve been given,

  8. October 24, 2007 at 5:16 pm

    Give yourself permission to make big, huge, monstrous mistakes in pursuit of destiny. The path to greatness is not perfect. Whatever it is, take a chance and go big.

  9. 9 Austin
    October 25, 2007 at 5:22 pm

    In contemplating destiny and evolving, there was a time when I believed my talent was my purpose. I felt as though I did miss the mark by wasting youthful years, for what…to live out a partially fulfilled purpose? How forlorn.
    I realize how shortsighted I had been, much like the bird prior to being pushed out of the nest. However fearsome that first move may be, it is essential to survival. I should have faith big enough to believe God stands ready to take me to new altitudes. Spreading my wings is required.

    You ask a difficult question. I AM willing to do the work to become. I am so limited by my thinking, though. To become who I want to be is a set up for disappointment. To be malleable in God’s hands is to live and fulfill destiny.

  10. 10 shir;ey
    November 1, 2007 at 10:44 pm

    pastor Abbye do you think that just maybe you are being a littleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to hard on yourself. I think that giving your all to what you are called to do will take care of all the rest.

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